Have you ever wondered why you become particularly anxious and nervous in certain situations? Or, why certain fears keep coming back regardless of how much you try to ignore them, push them away or think positive? A fundamental reason for why our fears keep clinging to us, is simply the fact that they reflect what we love. For example, if you love to be in the company of others, you will fear exclusion or rejection from a social group or person. Maybe, as a child, you experienced being rejected from a group that you felt part of, or wished to become part of. And now, as an adult, you may (either consciously or subconsciously) try to avoid the risk of re-experiencing the same situation and feeelings. Belonging to a group and being close to others is however something that we all need as human beings. For some people, being part of a group may be particularly important. Yet, we all need to feel close to a least one or a few persons in our lives. Fear of exclusion or rejection is thus a basic human feeling that is shared by all people.
Thus, fear is a natural emotion that should be embraced and accepted just like any other feeling. By pushing it away, it may grow even stronger and eventually start to limit you in life. Instead, the best way to use our fears is to acknowledge them, to “feel them fully”, and to use them as pathways to explore our wishes, desires, and needs even deeper – and to grow as persons.
Approaching our fears and emotional wounds can sometimes be hard on our own. Most of our emotional inprints from childhood are buried deep within our subconscious mind. Therefore, exploring our fears, and healing any hurtful experience from the past, may require a well-proven technique. EFT tapping and the Clear Beliefs Process are two of the most effective techniques for resolving/embracing fears and releasing buried emotions. MindShift Coaching works with both of these methods. If you have any fear or hurtful experience that you wish to address, warm welcome to contact Anna Brismar for a free short call (over phone or Zoom) or to book a session.
Below is a poem that I wrote in 2018 about fear and love.
LOVE AND FEAR GO HAND IN HAND
That which you love the most,
is that which you fear to loose
If you love to speak out your truths,
you will fear that no one wants to listen
If you love to be in company of others,
you will fear that no one wants to join you
If you love to be recognized for you achievements,
you will fear that no one appreciates your work
If you love to be free and self-sufficient,
you will fear to be dependent on others
If you love to be strong and healthy,
you will fear to be weak and vulnerable
The feelings of love and fear go hand in hand,
you will never have one without the other.
(By Anna Brismar, 2018)
(Photo by Max Goncharov on Unsplash)
